Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Emotional Dependence

In commenting on other blogs such as http://collegejay.blogspot.com/ I often get involved in questions about “emotional dependence”. I only use that phrase in the negative sense because it says enough in 2 words so that most people know basically what I mean.

I agree that there is nothing wrong with loving a friend so much that sometimes I deeply feel the need to share in fellowship (emotionally depend on him). What I mean by unhealthy emotional dependence is when I selfishly idolize someone to an extreme. Some signs of this extreme are an obsession where I think about him constantly, a jealousy when he spends time with others, or a demand to see him often. In other words, if I treat a guy like a boyfriend, not just a friend, then I have an unhealthy emotional dependence on him.

I definitely HAVE experienced emotionally fulfilling friendships. We all need those. Ask God for more of them as you keep reaching out to others in unselfish love.